Getting Back in the Game
Right now, I’m exhausted. I’m tired of hearing about COVID, thinking about it, planning around it and just everything about it. I just want to go back to my calm little world where I could go about my business without restrictions and go out and about as I please. A fantasy perhaps even under normal circumstances but definitely under these conditions.
The reality is that we’re in the middle of this thing unsure of how it will end, unsure of the pain it will continue to cause, unsure of what new obstacles it will throw at us tomorrow. It’s like walking into a forest and we’ve hit the point of no return. We can no longer see the light from the entrance, so we only have the choice of sitting by a tree letting the world happen to us, or to keep moving through the forest until we find our way out. You are so deep into it, turning around is not an option. You don’t have a map, don’t know the right direction so you just figure it out as you go because you have to.
It also reminds me of playing in a highly competitive basketball game where you’ve been behind for most of it. After a quarter or two, you’re exhausted. You’ve been playing so hard, giving it 100%, moving and shifting as the game changes and you just can’t see a way to win. You’ve been driving full throttle ahead and then it just hits you. A wall you run into where you’re just tired. Tired from all the driving and pushing and you don’t see how it’s even possible to win so the thought of throwing in the towel crosses your mind. You consider just letting the time run out or walking off the court out of frustration or anger because, what’s the point?
But, what do you really do in those moments right in the middle of the game when you’re the most tired and ready to give up? You rest. You take a break. You sit on the bench while someone else temporarily subs in for you. You catch your breath. You re-strategize. You don’t quit. You don’t know if your new strategy will work, but you don’t quit. After some time, you get back in the game and re-commit to the purpose, which is to defeat your opponent. You give all of your energy (again) until you’ve done everything you can to win, but not without resting along the way.
That’s the game we’re in right now. We’ve been emotionally and mentally working so hard from the beginning, moving and shifting as scheduling, guidelines and restrictions continue to change. Trying to navigate in a situation where we don’t know the outcome and it often feels like there’s no way to win. Eventually, we just get tired and we consider giving up. Every other option is too overwhelming when we hardly have the energy to get through the day. But, we can’t just let the time run out and we can’t just walk off the court, so we just need to take a break. We need to rest, take a breath, re-group, perhaps re-strategize how we manage our days and most importantly, re-commit to the purpose.
Now is the time to rest. Take a day off from work. Let the kitchen be messy. Put the to-do list in the junk drawer. Eat pizza for the 3rd time this week. Be ok with forgetting an item from the grocery store. Be ok with sending a happy birthday text instead of a card. Be ok with not wanting to decorate for Christmas. None of these things are game changers. Allow yourself this time to work through your fatigue and emotions and identify what source of strength or energy you need to pull from right now to build back up your spirit.
No one said you have to do this alone or that you need all the answers. No one said that you have to maintain the same level of activity, productivity and responsibility you once did. No one said you can’t stop to clear your head and re-focus and sometimes, that’s just what we need to do to get back in the game.